Meaningful Words of Sympathy for the Loss of a Wife
Share sincere and heartfelt condolences to help them feel supported. Nothing can make up for the deep heartache experienced after the death of a spouse, but carefully chosen words of sympathy are sure to help a grieving person feel less alone in their time of mourning. I'm so sorry to hear of the passing of your wife. She will never be forgotten. What a beam of light for all of us. You're in our thoughts and prayers. I know your wife must’ve been an amazing woman because you always beamed with pride whenever you spoke of her. Sending you an abundance of love. She shined so bright that the memory of her light will never dim. Sending strength and comfort. Your wife's passing has left us all reeling with confusion, grief, and sorrow. Please, let us know what we can do to help—you're not alone in this, now or ever. We love you. Your wife was such a wonderful woman. She was also an outstanding partner who will live in our hearts and memories forever. In loving memory of your wife, a person whose kindness and generous spirit touched the lives of everyone who knew him. She will be so missed. In loving memory of your wife: She was loved deeply by everyone who knew her. Hoping the support of friends and family brings you comfort at this difficult time. I’m deeply sorry for the loss of your beloved partner. You complemented each other like no other couple I know. May your precious memories bring you comfort. Everyone who knew her considered themselves lucky, myself included. I’m here to offer an ear or shoulder should you need one. Love never dies. Your wife’s love for you is everlasting. It was such a privilege and honor to work with your wife. She was an incredibly smart and thoughtful woman. May her memory live on forever. Your partner was such a special person. They will live in my heart forever. I’ll always admire the love shared between you and your wife. You shared a one-of-kind bond that can never be broken. Someone who shared so much life with you will always be a part of you. Bonds like yours are forever. Meet the wikiHow Experts Vernita Marsh, PhD, is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist with over 30 years of clinical psychology experience. Joseph Phillips, MSW, is a Clinical Therapist and Social Worker at Transformative Growth Counseling, which is based in Illinois and Florida. Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP, is a clinical therapist with over 18 years of experience. Jacqueline House, LMFT-A, is a Marriage and Family Therapist Associate who uses Solution Focused Brief Therapy, Collaborative Therapy, ACT Therapy, and Narrative Therapy to help her patients through problems such as anxiety and life transitions. Ken Breniman, LCSW, C-IAYT, is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Thanatologist with over 15 years of experience with grief therapy, complex trauma recovery and mindful mortal skills development.
Short Condolence Messages after the Loss of a Wife
If you're short on time, these brief condolences can still express sympathy. You don't need to share a long message with the grieving spouse—and, in fact, if they are overwhelmed with their own grief (and possibly funereal planning), they may not be in a position to read a long message. These short sympathy notes are brief, but they still effectively express how sorry you are to hear of their wife's passing: We share in your grief and pray for peace. All our love to you in this painful time. We all loved [wife's name], and we love you as well. Please be well. We're so sorry to hear about [wife's name]. Please, let us know what we can do. A light that dims here on earth shines that much brighter in the night sky. The light will be on in my heart for whenever it gets too dark. If you were here, I’d give you a hug. I’m so sorry for your loss. With love and remembrance, we share in your sorrow. The candle may go out, but the memory of its light remains. We’ve shared so much through the years and I’m here now to share the weight of your loss. Whatever you need, I’m standing by. I’m here to lend an ear or shoulder should you need one. Sharing in your sorrow and here for you in the days ahead. Thinking of you and sending my love during this difficult time. Even when we can’t see them, the stars still shine. Deepest sympathy. Words of sympathy feel inadequate in expressing grief and sorrow for a loss so great. Sending a warm embrace and all my love during this sad time. May faith uphold you during this difficult time. Our deepest sympathy. Forever loved. Never forgotten. You and yours are in our thoughts and prayers. May happy memories one day replace the sad in your heart. My condolences. A beautiful life well lived. He/she/they will never be forgotten. Is it OK to share condolences over text? "A phone call probably is preferred, but it all depends on the person," says licensed clinical psychologist Vernita Marsh, PhD. "Some people certainly would prefer text. Some people would complain that during this time [texts] would come across impersonal. So it's really [about] knowing that person."
Condolences for the Loss of a Wife of a Friend or Family Member
Share these condolence messages with close friends and family. When the wife of a close friend or family member (like a sibling or cousin) passes away, they need your support more than ever. Share these quotes to let them know how affected you are by the loss of their wife, and that you'll be by their side the whole time while they navigate their grief. The emptiness in your heart is the surest sign of the love you shared. From across the miles, we send our heartfelt sympathy and healing prayers during this difficult time. A love that deep never fades in memory, it only grows stronger in your heart. Wishing you peace and comfort during this sad time. May happy memories help lessen your sorrow during these difficult days. Thinking of you. I wanted to reach out and let you know that I’m here for anything you need. I’m so sorry for your loss. Keeping you close in our hearts. Our deepest sympathy. Please know that I am just a call or text away. Reach out anytime for any reason. I'm here for you now and always. As you navigate the difficult days ahead, please know that you aren't alone. We are here to help. Sending you strength and support during this difficult time. In this sorrowful time, sending thoughts of comfort and hope that you find strength to get through the difficult days ahead. We’re here for you. Those we love never truly leave us. Sending our love and sympathy to you. I share in your grief and send you all my love in this time of sadness. Sometimes there are no words for a loss so great. Praying for healing in the days to come. Thinking of you. No time with someone you love is ever long enough. Thinking of you with sympathy. Sometimes there's nothing to say. This is one of them. Here for you now and in the days ahead. Those we love never truly leave us, but rather remain a song that will forever be carried in the wind. May every sunrise remind you of the lingering beauty of yesterday's sunset. Those who live in our memories are never truly gone. A memory on the breeze, a whisper through the trees that says, “They will never be forgotten.” It's hard to imagine what you're going through right now, but please remember that you aren't in it alone.
Condolences for the Loss of a Wife of an Acquaintance
Reserve these messages for people you don't know as well. Whether it's a coworker, a friend of a friend, or some other acquaintance whose wife has passed, these messages are the perfect way to express your sympathies while maintaining a respectful emotional distance. No words can express how sorry I am for the loss of your wife. I didn’t know her personally, but I know how much you loved her, and I am here for you. Sending you strength today and peace in all the days ahead. My heart goes out to you and your family. My deepest condolences. I hope you feel that love and support that surrounds you during this difficult time. Wishing you peace and comfort during these difficult days. Our/my heartfelt condolences for your loss. I was incredibly saddened to hear about the passing of your dear wife. She was always so thoughtful and kind. She will truly be missed. Our/my thoughts are with you during this sad time. In these moments, when there are no words, know that the ones we love remain beside us, now and always. May love and comfort wrap you in their warm embrace during this difficult time. I’m so sad for your loss. Thinking of you. Sending thoughts of comfort and all my love. Caring thoughts are with you during this difficult time. There are no words for such a sad time. My condolences. During this difficult time, may faith, family and friends bring you peace.
Words of Sympathy after the Sudden Death of a Wife
After an unexpected loss, try one of these messages to offer comfort. No loss is easy, but a sudden loss—especially if it is tragic—will likely leave the surviving family reeling with confusion on top of extreme grief. Share these messages to let them know they're not alone in their shock and sorrow. When something like this happens, it leaves everyone figuring out how to pick up the pieces. There are no words, only love and support during this sorrowful time. I am here for you. The mind and heart reel at such a loss. But in the midst of such swirling confusion and tremendous grief, remember you are not alone—you are loved, as your wife was loved, and we will get through her loss together. Our deepest condolences on the sudden loss of your beloved wife. In her sudden parting, she leaves behind an eternal flame in our hearts. Our thoughts are with you. Even when we cannot see the sun, it is still there, shining down from the sky and spreading its warmth so that we may one day bask in it again. There are no words for the sudden loss of your wife, a person who was cherished by everyone who knew her. Our thoughts and love are with you in this time of sorrow.
Words of Sympathy for the Loss of a Wife to Illness
Express deep sorrow for the loss of a wife to cancer or another long illness. When a person has been sick for a long time, their death can bring mixed feelings: the surviving spouse may experience relief that their wife is no longer in pain; relief that the burden of being a caretaker has been lifted; guilt at feeling relief; a loss of purpose, now that they are no longer a caretaker; and, of course, grief for the loss of someone they loved so dearly. These condolences may help them feel supported and less alone in their time of mourning. She will be forever missed. Though we are grateful she is no longer suffering, we suffer so without her. Please be well. I am so sorry for your loss. I know this was not unexpected—and yet it is always unexpected, and always painful. Please let us know what we can do to help you through this time. We are so sorry to hear of [wife's name]'s passing. She suffered so long, we are relieved to know she is no longer in pain—but we will miss her, terribly, endlessly. You and yours are in our thoughts. We're so sorry to hear of [wife's name]'s death. You tended to her ceaselessly, and were a light for her in her final days, as she always was in all of our hearts. You have finished the race—now let us take care of you. Reach out whenever you're ready; we'll be here. [Wife's name] will always be in our hearts. Please take care of yourself at this time, you, who have done nothing but care for others until now. Let us know what we can do to make this time more bearable. We are so saddened to hear of [wife's name]'s passing. To you, who have been by her side through good times and bad, life without her must appear like a black, yawning chasm of grief. We are here to cross that chasm with you. We will be by your side, through the good times and the bad.
Words of Sympathy for the Loss of a Wife and Mother
Use these sympathetic messages after a wife and mother passes. The loss of a spouse is never easy, but when they are also a parent—especially if they're a parent to young children—it can be all the more difficult to fathom the hole their passing has left. A hug from me to you to let you know that today and every day, you are in my heart and thoughts. I’m so sorry for your loss. [Wife's name] was a beautiful wife, mother, friend, and soul. She'll never be forgotten. Our deepest sympathy to you and your children. Hoping that the support of loved ones brings you comfort during this sad time. You need only look in your heart to find what is lost. Sending our condolences to you and your kids. Gone, but never far from our hearts. Deepest sympathy for the loss of your wife and parenting partner in crime. She will be missed, always. If there wasn’t so much love, it wouldn’t be this hard to say goodbye. Our thoughts are with you and your children. Your wife was the brightest light in a sky full of stars. Sending love and support to you and the little ones during this hard time. There’s nothing to say to ease the loss of a wife and mother. We are here for you and send our deepest sympathy to you and your family. In loving memory of your wife and mother to your beautiful children. Thinking of you and them, and hoping you all find peace and strength in the days ahead. Wives and mothers never truly leave us. You need only look in your heart and she’ll be there. So sad for your loss. Wishing you comfort and remembering the kind spirit that was your wife and the best mother we ever knew. Our condolences for your loss.
Quotes about Losing a Wife
Look to the words of notable figures who have endured loss. Humans have loved and lost since the beginning of time, and expressing exactly how it feels has never gotten any easier, but many celebrated figures from history have tried. When you can't find the right thing to say, take inspiration and comfort from quotes about grief, death, and the loss of a spouse. “No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.” –C. S. Lewis, A Grief Observed Lewis' book, A Grief Observed, documents his grief following the loss of his wife to cancer. Even if your friend or loved one didn't lose their wife to illness, this book may offer comfort and insight while they navigate the strange forest of loss, especially if they are religious. “The death of a beloved is an amputation.” –C. S. Lewis, A Grief Observed “Her absence is like the sky, spread over everything.” –C. S. Lewis, A Grief Observed “Time itself is one more name for death.” –C. S. Lewis, A Grief Observed "To live in this world / you must be able to do three things: to love what is mortal; to hold it / against your bones knowing your own life depends on it; and, when the time comes to let it go, to let it go." –Mary Oliver, "In Blackwater Woods" "May you continue to inspire us: // To enter each day with a generous heart. / To serve the call of courage and love / Until we see your beautiful face again / In that land where there is no more separation, / Where all tears will be wiped from our mind, / And where we will never lose you again." –John O’Donohue, "On the Death of the Beloved" “Her angel’s face / As the great eye of heaven shined bright, / And made a sunshine in the shady place.” –Edmund Spenser “People you love never die.… Not completely. They live in your mind, the way they always lived inside you. You keep their light alive. If you remember them well enough, they can still guide you, like the shine of long-extinguished stars could guide ships in unfamiliar waters." –Matt Haig, How to Stop Time “What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” –Helen Keller “For there we loved, and where love is home, Home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts.” –Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr. “And when great souls die, after a period peace blooms, slowly and always irregularly. Spaces fill with a kind of soothing electric vibration. Our senses restored, never to be the same, whisper to us. They existed. They existed. We can be. Be and be better. For they existed.” –Maya Angelou "The sorrow we feel when we lose a loved one is the price we pay to have had them in our lives." –Rob Liano "Oh flesh, my own flesh, woman whom I loved and lost, / I summon you in the moist hour, I raise my song to you." –Pablo Neruda, "The Song of Despair" "Gradually, you will learn acquaintance / With the invisible form of your departed; / And when the work of grief is done, / The wound of loss will heal / And you will have learned / To wean your eyes / From that gap in the air / And be able to enter the hearth / In your soul where your loved one / Has awaited your return / All the time." –John O'Donohue, "For Grief" “It's so much darker when a light goes out than it would have been if it had never shone.” –John Steinbeck "Your absence has gone through me / Like thread through a needle. / Everything I do is stitched with its color." –W. S. Merwin, "Separation" “Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails.” –Mark Twain “Every sunset brings the promise of a new dawn.” –Ralph Waldo Emerson “Only in darkness can you see the stars.” –Martin Luther King Jr. "It hurts when they're gone. And it doesn't matter if it's slow or fast, whether it's a long drawn-out disease or an unexpected accident. When they're gone the world turns upside down and you're left holding on, trying not to fall off." –Walter Mosley, Debbie Doesn't Do It Anymore “There are no goodbyes for us. Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart.” –Mahatma Gandhi "Your body is away from me / but there is a window open / from my heart to yours. // From this window, like the moon / I keep sending news secretly." –Rumi, "The Window" "Suppose that the earthly lives she and I shared for a few years are in reality only the basis for, or prelude to, or earthly appearance of, two unimaginable, super-cosmic, eternal somethings. Those somethings could be pictured as spheres or globes. Where the plane of Nature cuts through them—that is, in earthly life—they appear as two circles (circles are slices of spheres). Two circles that touched. But those two circles, above all the point at which they touched, are the very thing I am mourning for, homesick for, famished for. You tell me 'she goes on.' But my heart and body are crying out, Come back, come back. Be a circle, touching my circle on the plane of Nature. But I know this is impossible. I know that the thing I want is exactly the thing I can never get. The old life, the jokes, the drinks, the arguments, the love-making, the tiny, heartbreaking commonplace." –C. S. Lewis, A Grief Observed
Bible Verses to Share with Someone Who Has Lost a Wife
If the surviving spouse is religious, consider sharing a relevant verse. In tough times, many Christians turn to the Bible for comfort and reassurance. If you know the grieving partner is religious, they may appreciate a supportive and inspirational verse. "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." –Psalm 46:1 "He will wipe every tear from their eyes. Death will be no more; mourning and crying and pain will be no more, for the first things have passed away." –Revelation 21:4 "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." –Matthew 5: 3–4 "Do not fear, for I am with you, do not be afraid, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand." –Isaiah 41:10 "He heals the brokenhearted, and binds up their wounds." –Psalm 147: 3 "Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh." –Luke 6:21 "The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak." –Isaiah 40:28–29 "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all consolation, who consoles us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to console those who are in any affliction with the consolation with which we ourselves are consoled by God." –2 Corinthians 1:3-4 "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves the crushed in spirit." –Psalm 34:18 "Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning." –Psalm 30:5
What to Consider When Expressing Condolences
Share fond memories of their wife. "I think that part of mourning is having memories," says clinical therapist Joseph Phillips, MSW, "and especially good memories can help someone kind of move through those stages of grief." If you ever met their wife, consider personalizing your condolences by sharing fond recollections or compliments. Her spouse will feel seen in their grief, and comforted to know the memory of their beloved won't soon be forgotten. I've never met someone so devoted to her family. She was a wonderful mother, and your children were so lucky to be loved by a woman like that. So were you. I'll never forget when she saved us in the community ball game. We thought we were goners until she was up to bat. What a talent! The memory of her singing "Sweet Caroline" at karaoke will live in my mind always! I can't say she had a beautiful voice—but she had such presence. She'll be so missed.
Offer concrete support, and follow through. Therapist Rebecca Tenzer, MAT, MA, LCSW, CCTP, CGCS, CCATP, CCFP, stresses the importance of offering specific help: "[C]onsider sending a meal over. Send a text to let them know that you're thinking of them. Offer to pick up their children from school. See if they'd like to come over and just sit on your couch to get out of the house." Marriage and family therapist associate Jacqueline House, LMFT-A says to avoid applying pressure on the grieving person to accept help or company when they're not ready or too overwhelmed to know what they need. House continues, "I would say, '...If you need me to give you support, I will give you support. If you need me to be there with you, I will be there for you,' and just kind of leave the ball at their court."
Encourage them to take care of themselves. After a loss, the surviving family may be struggling to stay afloat. Her partner may be overwhelmed with funeral plans and visits from grieving family and friends, as well as, potentially, adjusting to single parenthood. Additionally, grief has a way of making us forget ourselves—or wanting to forget ourselves—in ways that can negatively affect our mental or physical health. Encourage the surviving partner to take time for themselves every day, and to not rush the grieving process. If you can, you might consider offering specific ways or ideas to help them prioritize self-care. Grief therapist Ken Breniman, LCSW, C-IAYT, notes, "A lot of times when a spouse is about ready to say goodbye to their partner, their health gets compromised because they are spending so much time tending to the other person… [Make] sure their health isn't too drained by that and [seek]...support from spousal support groups or their friends and family, [and make] sure that they're not taking it all on themselves." Please take what time you need, alone or with your family. We'll be here for you, whatever you need, whenever you need it. I hope you can slow down in the weeks to come. Don't be afraid to delegate—we all want to help and show how much we loved [wife's name]. She would want you to get rest. We have a cabin on the lake a few hours away. It's all yours, whenever you and the kids need a getaway. Just let us know. Take it slow. The loss of a lifelong partner and friend isn't something you'll get over easily—or ever. Give yourself permission to feel your feelings, whenever they arise.
Just be there. It's easy to spend time wondering what we should say or worrying about saying the wrong thing, but in the end, no words will ever be "just right," and nothing will take away the pain of their grief. Dr. Marsh observes that it's often more helpful to be present and listen to a grieving person when they need to talk than it is to come up with the perfect words to express your sympathy: "Sometimes you don't have to say anything," she says, "but being a listening ear to that person can go a long way." If you need a listening ear, don't hesitate to reach out. My phone is on day and night, and I'll come over whenever you need. You're not alone in this. We don't have to talk if you don't want to. We can watch movies, go for a run, or just sit in silence. But whenever you're ready, remember I love you, and I'm listening. I'm not sure what to say. But I'm here.
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