The author, Vaibhav Vishal, is the Director, Program Development, MTV Networks India Pvt. Ltd. The views expressed in this article are his own.
I am a Bihari. And like any other country cousin of mine, I do not understand the meaning of the word “retrogression”. However, most of the discourses that I have read on my state have had this word in their first paragraphs. So I am glad I have used it already in this note. The social scientists would be happy. Let’s move ahead.
I am not going to talk about the pessimistic pangs being experienced by any and every Bihari for the past 60 years that the societal commentators like drum-beating about. Or the struggle for existence which our tribe is continuing with since time immemorial, the Nitish-Kumar-ki-chamkar-jyada-safed notwithstanding. Or the reasons for the deceleration of the state economy despite being so rich in natural resources and man power. Or the divide between the ruling class and the survivors. Or corruption. Or scams. Or red-tapism. Or Laloo Yadav. No. I am no Mr. Politico-Cultural-Social Physicist cum Mr. Fix-it and neither do I intend becoming one.
Though it is easy. Everybody loves to hate Bihar. And everyone has an opinion about it.
People adore singling out the state for all the ills of country. Negative, sir! After Buddha and Mahaveer, this mass of earth has not made any positive contributions to the nation. It is a hole in the Union of India. Uncle Roget would have the longest entry for the word in his thesaurus. Underlined poverty. Highlighted penury. Corruption. Population. Illiteracy. Lawlessness. Uncouth citizens. The list continues.
True. But are things in place with India minus Bihar?
Let’s have a look. Corruption is rampant everywhere. Politicians are as vile in Tamil Nadu and West Bengal. Senior State Services officers are as dishonest in Madhya Pradesh and Kerala. Atrocities against women are as much in Rajasthan. Godhra happens in Gujarat. Nithari in Uttar Pradesh. Kid-trafficking in Andhra Pradesh. Female infanticide in Punjab. Farmers committing suicides in Karnataka. Gang rapes in Delhi University and Media houses getting rammed by unruly mobs right in the middle of the commercial capital.
Moral of the story, well, almost: We are a sad country. With or without the state of Bihar.
So what? Laloo Yadav still makes a funnyman. And the Biharis remain an imbecile race; including the English-speaking, visibly more sophisticated ‘Harrys’ of the premiere institutions; to be ridiculed. Every fourth Hindi film has an actor attempting a mockery of the accent. The ai-yai-yo of the Madrasis has now been replaced by a made-to-order singsong baritone of the ex chief janitor of the state. The netizens love the joke on LPY and Japan. And the one on Musharraf, Kashmir and Lalooland. Ha Ha Ha. Even the inanimate Microsoft Word spell-checks the word “Bihar” to “Bizarre”. Did you hear the one about the fresh-in-Mumbai Bihari counting the floors of the Express Towers? Ha Ha Ha yet again.
Yeah, there is a strange hair-do primate with ears full of untrimmed hair acting as the spokesperson of Bihar, but then again, the Supergirl cloaks covering the girth of Jayalalitha are yet to become fashion statements. Yeah, there has been some pativrata wife on the seat of the chief minister, but then again, not specifically are the people of Maharashtra completely unaware of what remote-control means. Yeah, there are the caste-conflicts and killings and kidnappings, but then again, Naxalites are not just using toy-guns against the inhabitants of the cyber-hamlets of the erstwhile Naidu territory.
This is not to absolve the terra firma from being the most visible blotch on the Indian map. But the fact remains that Bihar is just a splitting image of India. Slightly louder, yes, but a reflection, nevertheless. Living amongst adversity. Moving on. Staying alive. Tolerating ugly regimes. Accepting the way things are. These are all our national traits.
Why point accusing fingers at just the Republic of Bihar?
Could it be because it is the Biharis themselves who get a perverse pleasure in accepting and flaunting that ‘reality’ whereas the rest of the country chooses to keep it under wraps? I am not going to use the word retrogression here, despite the temptation. We steal electricity. We capture booths. We kidnap and kill human beings. And we are loud about it. Knowing very well that it is no different anywhere else. The pathos is the nation’s. We are just finding some wicked humor in it. Give us more of those Rabri Devi imitations, Shekhar Suman. We revel in this image of ours. Genuinely believing that it is cool to be uncool.
That reminds me… did you hear that story about the stolen car of Laloo’s personal Physician and where exactly was it finally found…!?
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