Bring up one of her favorite topics.
Show her that you care about what she likes. Watch her favorite movie, listen to her favorite song, or try out that cool sushi place she mentioned. Then, text her what you thought about it! You’ll make her feel special and start a great conversation at the same time. If you’re not sure what she likes, look through her social media feed for inspiration or ask her for book, movie, or song recommendations. For instance, if she’s really into a sport, read up on her favorite players or athletes to say something like, “Tobin Heath has a new #1 fan today. Guess who it is?” Check out something she’s recommended, and let her know by texting, “So I picked up that book you were talking about. I need to go buy the sequel now.” Give one of her hobbies a shot, and tell her how it went. For example, text, “I have a confession to make. I tried knitting, since I know you’re a pro... It didn’t end well.”
Give her a compliment that’s not about her looks.
Make her blush by flattering her a little. You can’t really go wrong with a sweet, genuine compliment. But if you really want to make her smile and build connection, try complimenting something beyond just the way she looks. Think about what makes her special to you, and tell her what you appreciate about her energy, personality, or her mind. “I really love the way you think. Please tell me you write all these incredible ideas down.” “Ugh, I’ll admit it–you’re funnier than me. ????” “You have this gift of making other people feel really happy. It’s kind of inspiring.” “You're really beautiful, but I think what drew me in most was your spirit.”
Make a list of reasons why she’s amazing.
Describe 3-10 things you just love about her. If you can come up with more, feel free! Talk about moments you’ve shared together, funny things she’s done, and things she’s taught you. You can also talk about why you admire her and her accomplishments. Check out the example below: 5 Reasons Why You’re the Best: You make the best cereal ever. You’ve helped me develop an actual sense of style. You have amazing hair. You have the kindest heart of anyone I know. You’re fearless. (#1 gymnast in the state?!? Go you!)
Tell her you can’t stop thinking about her.
Send her a cute reminder that she’s always on your mind. She’ll feel special when she knows that you care about her enough to think about her randomly throughout the day. This technique’s probably best for a girl you’re dating or know really well, so it doesn’t come off as over-the-top. You can try: “You showed up in my dream last night. ????” “I’m trying to focus, but I can’t stop thinking about you.” “I just keep thinking about kissing you again.” “People started giving me weird looks at the library. I realized I had a huge smile on my face because I was thinking about you again.”
Send her a supportive message.
Let her know you’ve got her back through tough times. When she’s having a rough day, she might really need that extra boost. Cheer her up and remind her she’s incredible through a simple text to basically say “You’ve got this!” Remind her of a time when she was super successful, “You did so well on the last presentation. You’re going to crush this one!” Tell her what she can look forward to once the tough situation’s over, “After your test tomorrow, wanna get ice cream to celebrate?” Shoot her a simple message to say that you’re there for her, “Let me know if you need any help. I believe in you!”
Bring up your favorite memory of her.
Let her know that the time you spend with her is worth remembering. Think about something you two did together or even a moment where she did something cute. Bring up where you were, what you two were doing, and most of all, how it made you feel! Ask if she remembers the occasion, too. Mention your first impression of her. For instance, “The first time I saw you, I thought, ‘There’s no way that girl’s human. She can kickflip like a pro, and she looks like a mini version of Beyoncé.’” You can try getting really nostalgic and specific, especially if you’ve been together for a while. Try something like, “Do you ever think about that time we went stargazing in Joshua Tree? I wish someone would write a song about that.” Or, bring up a funny memory like, “Remember when we accidentally knocked over that whole display in Trader Joe’s? Embarrassing. I’ll never look at cornbread the same way again LOL.”
Send her a good morning or goodnight text.
She’ll know she’s special if she’s your first and last thought every day. Tell her you’re looking forward to seeing her if it’s the morning, or just tell her you’re sending good vibes for the day. If you’re just about to head to sleep, tell her she’s on your mind. If you two are in a relationship, or you know she likes you, you can even say you hope she’ll show up in your dreams. Try out some of these: “Hey! Good morning. I can’t wait to see you later.” “I hope your day is as amazing as you are.” “Thinking of you. Hope you’ll show up in my dreams tonight ????.” “Hope you sleep well. I love that you’re my last thought every night.” “G’nite. I know my dreams are gonna be great, but they can’t compare to you.”
Ask her genuine questions.
Good questions show her you value her thoughts and opinions. If you’re in a relationship, she’ll feel heard and special when you ask about her life, dreams, and goals. If you don’t know her as well, you can ask questions about her hobbies, events she’s mentioned, and her favorite things. Initiating a thoughtful conversation is a great way to open the door to more intimacy. For an everyday conversation, ask a specific question like “How’d your presentation go?” instead of asking a more general question like “How was your day?” For a crush you don’t know well, ask something like, “What are your top 3 favorite things in life?” For a deeper conversation, ask something like, “Hey what’s something you’ve always dreamed about doing? Why haven’t you gotten to do it yet?”
Tell her she’s your ideal partner-in-crime.
Use this text to tell her how much you like spending time with her. It’s like saying you’d pick her to be on your team. Pick a serious activity like growing old together or traveling around the world if you’re in a relationship. But if she’s your crush, or if you want to tone down the romantic mood, choose a silly activity like surviving the zombie apocalypse. You can even use this text to lead into asking her out, “You’re the only person I’d want to spend karaoke night with. Should we plan a date?” Choose a funny scenario and say you two would make a great team, “If I had to pick a desert island survival buddy, I’d pick you. We’d be better than Tom Hanks and Wilson.” If you know the feelings are mutual, say something like, “There’s no one else I’d rather spend every day with.”
Send her the digital version of a classic gift.
This cute gesture is an easy way to make her smile. Send her a few emojis of classic romantic gifts like flowers or chocolate. Even though it’s not a physical gift, it’s a nice way to show her you care. You can even say something like, “This is a placeholder until I can bring you the real thing.” Send her a text that says “Knock knock.” When she says, “Who’s there?” send back “Flower delivery for you ????????????.” If you’re in a long-distance relationship or don’t live super close, say something like, “If I were there, I’d bring you a box of ????.”
Text her a song that reminds you of her.
Music can be a romantic way to express how she makes you feel. Either make a playlist, or send her an individual song that makes you think of her. If you can, send a song you two listened to together. You could even use this as a way to start a conversation by creating a playlist together. Send your song with a text like, “This makes me think of you every time I hear it.” Or try something like, “Can this be our song?” You could also try something like, “This song makes me feel almost as happy as you make me feel.” Pair the song with a cute memory, “Remember when we danced to this at Kenzie’s party?”
Share little moments from your day.
Send photo updates to make her feel included and important in your life. Sharing photos from your day does two key things. First, it makes her feel like she’s the person you want to turn to when something fun or interesting happens in your life. Second, a photo from you brings you to the top of her mind–which is especially awesome if you two aren’t in a relationship yet. Just don’t overdo it with this one. Send her 1 photo from your day, and if she sends photos back, you can send more. “This is what I look like when I’m thinking about you.” Pair this text with a cute or over-the-top selfie. “I can’t think of a better person to share this with.” You can send a funny photo or a sincere photo after this one. “I saw something WILD I just had to share.” Reader Poll: We asked 324 wikiHow readers about the best ways to build a connection with someone they like over text, and only 7% of people recommended bringing up super deep, philosophical topics. [Take Poll] Instead, keep it light, friendly, and sweet—save the serious topics for in-person conversation!
Send a simple appreciation text.
Write a genuine text telling her that she matters to you. This one almost seems like the easy way out, but trust us, you can’t go wrong with true gratitude. Tell her about a moment when you realized she was important to you, or just keep it really simple and say, “I’m so grateful for you.” Expressing gratitude can even boost your own positive feelings. Let her know when you appreciate the small things she does, “Thanks so much for picking up dinner. It means a lot to me.” Talk about how she helps you get through things by saying something like, “I couldn’t imagine surviving that Christmas party with anyone else. I’m so thankful for you.” You could also tell her how she makes you feel, “You’re my guiding light. You make me feel so understood, and I can’t tell you how much I appreciate that.” If she's done something thoughtful to you recently, send her a message letting you know how you appreciate it. It's important that the message is genuine and from the heart. She'll definitely feel your passion and appreciation!
Let her know when you miss her.
Talk about what it feels like when she’s not around. Sending an “I miss you” text once in a while is a great way to say, “You’re important to me!” Just be careful not to overload her with a “miss you” text every time she steps out of the room. “Hey, I miss you. The sky’s a little grayer when you’re not here.” “Class didn’t feel the same without you. I’ll see you Friday!” “Missing you and your adorable dimples.” “Don’t mind me. Just chilling at Wing’s n’ Things and missing that special someone to share my fries with.”
Ask her for advice.
This text proves she’s your confidante and that you trust her. People feel special when they know you value what they have to say. If you know her well or are in a relationship, ask for advice on something serious. But if you aren’t that close yet, ask for her opinion on something a little silly. You could even ask for a recommendation like, “You clearly have awesome taste in restaurants. Where can I get the best sushi?” Keep it light hearted with something like, “Can I get your advice? Should I start a career as a professional origami artist?” Ask for help with something more serious, like, “Hey, what should I say to Tommy about that rude comment he made?”
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